Road To Forgiveness - Prologue

As if a thick curtain was lifted, Lady Riddle heard mumbling growing louder. Finally she was able to hear something, but her eyes were still to heavy to open. There were familiar voices.
"As far as I can tell, Riddle is weakened by drugs of some sort and ze loss of a lot of blood. Luckily most wounds were superfical. Several hours of rest wizout any interruptions will do her some good.", she heard someone sounding like Frederic say and protests by others who were forced to leave his patient alone.
Then the sounds faded and Lady Riddle drifted back into sleep.

She dreamed of a strange creature. It looked like an angel. The skin was chalk white, the hair coal black and the eyes... one was black and the other white. It was impossible to tell the gender of the person as well. All feathers were half black and half white, but the colour sheme of each feather was unique.
"My child," the angel said with an androgynous voice.
"Who are you?" the dream version of Lady Riddle asked. If it was a dream at all. The angel's face showed no emotion.
"I am the only one of a kind that has no name. I am not an angel and not a demon. I am not light or dark. I am both and none of them."
"Why did you call me child?"
"In your blood flows a part of me. So I can call you my descendant, can I not?"
"I am related to an angel?"
"Yes and no, because I am an angel and I am not."
"Whatever you are... Why are you here?"
"I wanted to talk to you. I have watched you for a long time."
"Really? Then why are you here now? Why weren't you there when I was in need for family? Or is this cursed blood in my veins unable to hold a family?!"
"You are angry and hurt."
"Well, yes!? My blood related family sold me! My first forster family was a jester I left and the second is a pirate crew I will most likely have to leave, too! And now you are here, saying you saw all this! Why didn't you do anything?!"
"I must not interfere."
"You-? Damn you! You said you are my relative. So you did interfere at some point!"
"Yes, I did break the rule. But I atoned."
"And now you can come here and pretend everyting is alright?"
"No. I had to come here because of Scarlet Seraph Of Hope. Nothing is alright, the balance has been disrupted. I came to find the reason."
"... Am I the reason?"
"No, I am here with you because I wanted to talk to one of my descendants for the first time."
"Because I am on the way..."
"If you whish you can put it this way."
"Well, at least I know where my inability for close relationships comes from. Seems literally to run in the family."
"I do not understand why you are mad at me. I never did you any harm."
"Damn you! How can you be so calm and emotionless?"
"Any emotion means to pick a side. If I comfort you and understand your feelings or if I get angry at you for not understanding me, I would pick a side. That is something I must not do."
"You are weird... How are we related anyway? Are you my lost great great great grandfather or -mother?"
"We are not related like this. A part of me is inside your blood."
"So what is the relation between the two of us?"
"I am simply one of your ancestors, one of your relatives. I surprises me you ask such things anyway. You said before you never had a family like this."
"I am only curious. Say, are there more descendants you watch?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"Why? Because it's natural, isn't it? Because I want to know who I could have been. I want to know where I come from. Who I am!"
"You never wanted this before you met me. You know exactly who you are. There is no need to tell you.
If I tell you there were others, you might go and search for them. You could remind your parents of something they did years ago and maybe regretted their whole life. You would find relatives who are not connected to your branch of the family for centuries.
If I tell you there were other descendants from me, you would find strangers to you, but the family you long for.
If I tell you there were no others, you might feel the burden of continuing the blood line. You would force yourself to keep it alive. You would sacrifice what is most dear to you for a duty nobody placed on you."
Either way, my visit would result in a disturbance. Therefore I will not answer you."
"Your visit is already a disturbance. Or shall I pretend I never met you?"
"My visit has no consequences for the balance so far and therefore, it's not a disturbance. Your decisions are not influenced by me."
"So you won't do anything to help me..."
"You never needed help from me and you do not need my help now."
"Right now I need every help I can get."
"Why? You are safe now and your friends are out of danger."
"...Are they still my friends?"
"You know the answer, child. You almost died for them."
"I almost died as a traitor without being able to put things right or to make up for what I did."
"You are not dead."
"But how can I ever make up for my actions?"
"Sacrificing yourself was an opportunity."
"Have they forgiven me?"
"You will find out."
"You aren't helping."
"Because you do not need forgiveness from your friends."
"What are you talking about? Yes, I do!"
"You need forgiveness from somebody else."
"I see..."
"I hope you do." The strange angel said and vanished, leaving Riddle in dreamless blackness.

Lady Riddle woke up in a cabin she knew well. It was the infirmary. She felt the soft pressure of professional bandages on her arm and several other parts of her body. The painkillers must have worn off, since now she felt the countless wounds throbbing and the stitches itching. The deep cut in her upper arm was a stupid idea now, but back in the cave, it seemed to be the only way to get Aslansa out. As for the 'x'... it was better to hide the scar from Lilt. There was no point in reminding him of this.
She looked around and found herself alone in the whole room. She recalled Frederic had sent everybody out, even though it felt more like something she had dreamed. Only partly she noticed her fedora was nowhere to be seen.
Frederic was not here and all the other beds were empty. Presumably Angel was in her cabin again.
Lady Riddle carefully sat up and with relief she noticed the absence of blurred vision and dark spots. Even though walking did cause her pain she forced her body to move over to a window and looked outside. It was dark, but there was a light stripe over the horizon. Either the sun had sunk or was about to rise.

What did you expect? You broke everybody's trust in you., a small vicious voice whispered inside her head. Riddle knew this voice all to well. It was with her before Vieth took care of her. It had been sleeping for quite some time but Krashune had awaken it.
There is no way they will welcome you back. Not after what happened to Angel because of you. What did you really do to help her? Krashune was right. You weren't there for her when she needed you the most. All of this happened because of you.
"I know...", Lady Riddle whispered and for a moment, darkness seemed to close around her, like it had done so many years ago.
You are all alone again.

As soon as she felt strong enough, Lady Riddle left the infirmary to see Angel. When she opened the cabin door, she saw Angel wraped in bandages like a mummy. At several points crimson stains were visible. Omega, Aslansa, Aisuru, Dan, Sparky, Crystal and Reaper were in the cabin but sleeping. Angel was having nightmares, Riddle could tell by her face. "What have I done..." she thought and humbled silently back into the infirmary. There was no way she could look Angel in the eyes ever again.

Later on, she woke up once more. It was a sunny day outside.
"Ah, ye be awake. I will go and tell ze ozers." Frederic said, but Riddle held him back. "Bitte nicht.", she whispered. The doctor raised an eyebrow. "Das ausgerechent von dir? Du bist doch sonst auch immer eine der ersten an 'nem Krankenbett."
"Sie sollen mich nicht so sehen..."
"Ungeschminkt?", Frederic asked with a grin. Lady Riddle shook her head."Schwach."
The doctor smiled at her. "Nun gut, dann werd ich mal ganz alleine versuchen, die komplette Mannschaft abzuwehren.", he joked with a exaggeratedly plaintive voice and left.

Lady Riddle did not know how much time has passed, but sooner or later, Frederic would have to let the others in or release her from the infirmary.
You can't hide in here forever. What are you going to tell them, when they ask for a reason?
"The truth. I have nothing else."
They will not believe it. They will not believe you did it for Angel. Not after what happened to her. Not after you sold them out. You're acting was too good. You made a lie the truth and now the truth will always look like a lie.
"It would have happened anyway, wouldn't it? It was a trap the whole time."
Not without you. Not without your great plan that failed so impressively. You made it so much worse.