literature

April Fools 1

Deviation Actions

Diluculi

Published: Mar 31, 2014

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Literature Text

Putting The Band Together

I: The Rogue

The reliability of mail was nothing which could be taken for granted out on the seas. Especially not when the receiver was the captain of a crew known for spontaneous adventures and unexpected curses. Also, doesn't the delivery of a package normally require a messenger? Yet here it was, standing all alone on Lady Riddle's table: a packet wrapped in purple and white stripes. A small card was attached to it.

Lady Riddle, Trickster & ~~member~~ ~~officer~~ Captain of the Black Fedora Pirates
Sangue-Padre
The High Seas

Carefully, as if she was disarming a bomb, Lady Riddle unwrapped the package, revealing a wooden box with holes in it.
"Strange", Riddle muttered and to her surprise, there was a high pitched voice answering, reminding the captain of a clamouring sparrow.
"Finally! Now what are you waiting for? Get me out! Out! Out out outoutout!", it demanded.
"Who are you?", Lady Riddle asked. She had been sailing here long enough to know when it was time to get suspicious.
"An enchanted prince. get me out and I'll marry you and we'll live happily ever after", the voice answered, each word was dripping with sarcasm.
"Aye, sure you are. But I already have my happy end", Lady Riddle claimed and earned a deep hearted sigh.
"Would you let me out if I tell you I'm a genie and will fulfil three of your wishes?", the creature inside asked.
"I think you need an oil lamp for that."
"For all that's holy to you, woman! Just let me out, will you? You have no idea how long I am trapped in here already!"
Lady Riddle pondered for a moment. Something about that strange package alarmed her. Yet, there were enough magic users on the ship to help her solving any possible mess. Besides, she was curious about the creature hidden inside and the sender of this package.
It was easy to lift the lid of the box. As soon as it was removed, a small person flew out of it and placed itself in front of Lady Riddle's face. It looked like a tiny man, but with dark blue skin, bright red hair and beard. The wings were insect like and the clothing was simply absent.
"Took you long enough!", the strange man complained and crossed his arms.
"Who and what are you?", the captain asked.
"I'm your fairy godmother and you can call me Fluttershine!", the creature snapped and flew across the room, searching for something.
"Got something to drink?", he asked.
"Nope", Lady Riddle answered.
"You got to be kidding me! You're a pirate! Pirates always drink rum!"
"Except for this one."
"Ugh! Just my luck...", the creature complained and flew back to the captain.
"Anyway, I shall proceed with my mission..."
"You could tell me who you are, why you came here and who sent you, for a start", Lady Riddle suggested.
"Maybe I sent myself, because I love being put into a package and argue with smart-mouth pirates", the nameless creature griped. The captain rolled her eyes.
"Why are you here, then?"
The creature's eye started to shine.
"To do this!", he shouted and created a portal right under Lady Riddle's feet.
"While you have fun, I'll hold the line here", he laughed as she fell down a blurry tunnel.

II: The Bard

Virgil was surprised to find a package resting in the center of his room. It was wrapped in paper with prints of cherry blossoms on it, making it look somewhat girly. There was a note attached to it. but Virgil just glanced over it, wondering if there was the name of a sender. When it wasn't, he carelessly ripped the paper of the present, eager to see what would be inside. He was disappointed when he found nothing but a wooden box with holes in it. This didn't look like a present from a girl at all. He had expected flowers or a cake or whatever beautiful girls would gift someone they like, in other words, someone like him. He took the box and shook it.
"Ow! What are you doing! Stop it!", a high pitched voice complained. Something about it was familiar to Virgil. He out the box down and opened it. A fat, tiny man emerged from it. His skin was dark blue and his hair and beard crimson red. His dark, almond shaped eyes glinted angrily at Virgil.
"What a way to greet a cousin", the man complained. Virgil picked him up and poked him.
"You're a pixie, aren't you?", he asked.
"Stop that!", the man snapped and tried to push the poking finger away. Virgil ignored these attempts and continued.
"No, I don't see why", he stated.
"I'll bite it off!", the pixie man threatened.
"Yeah, yeah, sure thing", Virgil commented. The pixie grunted something into his beard. There was a sharp pain flowing through Virgil, starting from the tip of his index finger. With a scream, Virgil let the man fall down the floor as he quickly shook him off his hands.
"You bit me!"
"Told you so, boy wonder", the pixie growled and flew into the air.
"But you bit me!"
"Told you to stop it, didn't I?"
For a moment, Virgil was about to try to squash the visitor between his hand like an annoying bug. But since he wasn't too keen on being bitten again, he decided against it.
"What do I owe the honour of your presence?", he asked, now trying an different approach.
"Don't try to butter me up!", the man warned.
"I assure you, I am clearly not!"
"Do you think I'm stupid?!", the pixie shouted furiously.
"Of course I don't", Virgil lied. A devilish grin appeared on the dark blue face before his,
"Good, then I will surely enjoy this. Don't know about you though, but I can't say I care", he stated.
Suddenly, there was no longer ground beneath Virgil's feet and he fell down a blurry corridor.

III. The Sorceress

The black box was waiting for Lilin on the table in her room. Whoever invented its colour, they had tried really hard to go for something darker than black. They had almost succeeded. It barely reflected any light and in the dim light of Lilin's room, it almost appeared to be a box shaped hole in the scenery.
Suspiciously, Lilin approached it and pressed her ear against it. When nothing was ticking, she relaxed a little. But who would send her a package? There wasn't any event going on at the academy, so nobody was obliged to gift her anything. She found a small note attached to the box. It was of the same colour, but the writing was done with a snow white ink:

Lilin
~~Skull~~ ~~Blood~~ Grave Dormitory
Otherworlde Academy

Lilin relaxed even more. The sender was probably none of her strange family. This wasn't their style. Carefully she removed the wrapping and found a wooden box with air holes in it. The blue bird, still without a name, carefully hopped onto the box and tapped against it.
"What are you waiting for? Let me out of here!", a squeaky voice demanded. Lilin tried to catch a glimpse of what was inside the box, but couldn't.
"Who or what are you?", she asked.
"What do I have to say so you will let me out?", the voice asked after a pause.
"Promise me that you're harmless", the devil suggested.
"I swear I am!", the box immediately replied.
Lilin wasn't sure she could trust the inhabitant of the box, but her curiosity worked against her suspicion. Also, she didn't really want to torture the creature captured inside.
"I take you up your word", she declared and carefully removed the lid from the box. A fairy-like creature flew out of it. It was a tiny, thin man with insect wings, dark blue skin and fiery red hair and beard.
"Now that was easy", the creature stated and grinned at the devil.
"Who sent you?", she asked, ignoring the creature's comment.
"You will find out", the man laughed.
Before Lilin could ask what he meant by this, the ground under her disappeared. Quickly the devil summoned her wings to prevent herself from falling down.
The tiny man made a dumbfounded face.
"That's not how it's supposed to work!", he complained.
Lilin grapped the creature before landing on the remaining floor.
"You said you were harmless", she stated angrily.
"Hate you break it to you, princess, but I lied", the creature laughed and teleported itself out of Lilin's hand. The devil looked around, but the strange creature was nowhere to be seen. After several minutes of silence, Lilin dismissed her wings and looked at the strange blurry hole on the ground. Maybe she should get a teacher to have a look at this. They all seemed to be capable of opening and closing portals. But then, this was the Otherworlde Academy. Pretty sure they would not be to fond of a student who came running for help each time something unusual happened. Lilin kneeled down next to the blurry hole. She could vaguely make out a room, which was clearly not the one beneath hers. She was convinced this thing was in fact a portal.
Suddenly, there was a bleating laughter behind her and with an astounding amount of force, the blue man pushed Lilin down the portal. She tried to summon her wings again, but this time, she had no space to use them.
"Enjoy your stay, princess", the tiny man sneered somewhere above her.

IV: The Medic

When she had finally recovered enough from the exhaustion and the poison, Nera woke up. Ghost had curled up beside her and was sleeping. The witch noticed the lines or salt around them and petted the black cat with a smile.
"Thank you", she whispered. Her body was still a little sore, but that was probably because the floor or a small hut in the middle of the forest is not the most comfortable place to sleep. She opened the door to find a thing line of salt on the other side of the threshold. On the other side, there was a bouquet of flowers and a present, wrapped in green paper. Surprised and a little bit confused, Nera brought both items inside. There was a little note attached to each of them.

Get well soon!
~ Yakkone

Nera blushed slightly as she read this and searched for something she could use as a substitute for a vase. There were no dew drops on the flowers and they hadn't fully bloomed yet. This meant Yakkone had been here not long ago. Nera blushed even more. She had no idea how long she'd been sleeping, but it's been probably a day or more. Still, he had left her fresh flowers.
"I'm sorry for you", she whispered to them and filled a tea pot with water to use it as a vase. It was the only thing she possessed with could hold the bouquet. Nera realised she needed a bath and fresh clothes before she could come near any sentient being without insulting their senses. The strange present could wait, she decided and left for the near spring.
When she returned, Ghost was still sleeping, though now he had moved onto the roof of the hut, occupying the only spot where the warm sun could warm his fur without being dimmed by leaves or blocked by branches.
When Nera approached, he lazily opened one of his green eyes.
"The house is quite a mess", he commented and Nera laughed. She knew well that he wanted to apologize for what he did while still blaming her for the fact that he had to do it. After the witch had swept up the spilled salt, Ghost follwed her inside and they both took a look at the strange package.

Nera Gullingham
~~Hut In The Woods~~ ~~City Prison~~ Hut In The Woods

"This wasn't delivered by Sera. She doesn't need such strange notes", Ghost remarked and poked the packaged with his paw. Nera nodded in agreement and carefully removed the wrapping. A wooden box with holes in it appeared underneath it. Ghost sniffed and shuddered.
"Stinks of pixies", he said.
"You don't smell of roses either!", an angry voice shrieked from inside the box. Ghost hit the box as a reply and was awarded with:
"Stop that, you fuzzy ball of fleas!"

"Stop it, both of you", Nera interrupted.
"Please, Miss! Let me out of this horrible cage!", the voice pleaded.
"It's definitely a stinking pixie", Ghost hissed at the box. "You should open it with a long stick. You can't trust them", he told the witch. She simply smiled at him. Ghost mewed sulkily, knowing exactly what her smile mean. He picked up her wand and carefully watched her opening the box. A tiny creature with dark blue skin and scarlet hair an beard flew out of it. Ghost kept his eyes glued on the pixie as he jumped onto Nera's shoulder.
"Thank you so much for freeing me, Miss!", the tiny man cheered and bowed mid-air several times.
"I finally can carry on with my mission, thanks to you, Miss!", he announced happily. Nera took the wand from Ghost and stored it in her bag, which she still carried around her shoulder.
"What's your mission and who locked you in this box?", she asked friendly.
The man grinned at her. Ghost arched his back, ready to jump at the pixie, when suddenly, Nera was standing on a hole in the ground.
"This!", the pixie laughed as the witch and the cat fell down a blurry tunnel.

V: The Fighter

Ludovica had not expected to find a present next to her coffin when she got up. She didn't celebrate her mortal birthday or the night she was made a vampire, because in her opinion, it was useless to an immortal creature to do something like that. She didn't stop her children from celebrating their special dates though. The present confused her. Even if she could remember the exact date of any special day of her past life, she was sure this wasn't one of them. Also, she was even more convinced that nobody knew about any of those dates, so there shouldn't be a present. yet, there it was, wrapped in gold coloured paper. The baroness picked it up and found a small note attached to it. It simply contained the sending address, but nothing about a sender. It surely wasn't brought here by the order. If they had found her, this castle would already be blown to pieces. Ludovica couldn't stand unsolved matter,s so she neatly unwrapped the paper and folded it before leaving it for Ygor to clean. She now looked at a wooden box with air holes in it. Also, she could sense a living creature inside of it.
She opened the box and found a small winged creature inside of it. It was humanoid and the ruby red beard indicated that it was male. He huddled in one corner of the box, trying to get the largest distance between himself and the vampire. Sweat glistened on the dark blue skin.
"Please don't kill me!", he squeaked.
"You arre a fairry, arren't you?", Ludovica asked with her usual cold voice. The man nodded.
"A pixie, your highness, to be exact. Please don't kill me!"
"Does Andvarri send you?""
"Nn-no, your highness", the pixie answered, now slightly trembling.
"Who did it zen?", she answered. With a defeated sigh, the man flew into the air.
"I really, really do not want to do this", he began and summoned a portal underneath the vampire. She quickly transformed into a bat to avoid the fall. Also, before the pixie knew what was going on, he found himself in the claws of an angry bat, who smashed him painfully against a wall. The baroness assumed her human form again and picked up the whimpering man.
"Vat vas zat?" she hissed angrily.
"Please... I am only doing as I was told. I never volunteered for this! But nobody wanted to have to get the vampire and one of us had to do it! It was just bad luck! Please don't kill me!", he whined.
Ludovica glanced over to the portal.
"Vat verre yourr orrderrs?"
"Tomakeyoufallthroughtheportal... I'msorryI'msorryI'msorry!", he squealed and tried to get away from the vampire, who let him escape. After all, she could still sense him and catching the pixie was easy for her. The baroness looked at the portal. It was hard to make out what was on the other side, but it looked like a giant cushion. She wasn't too fond of a portal in the middle of her castle. It was like a giant hole in her defense.
"Undo it!" she commanded. A muttering answered her.
"I can't hearr you", Ludovica stated.
"I can't do that! It will only disappear once your stepped through it", the pixie shouted, the high-pitched voice trembling with fear. The baroness was sure she didn't need to get her sister or any of her children to be sure that he wasn't lying.
"You betterr tell ze trruz", she said and a black bat flew into the portal. Back in the portal, the pixie sighed with relief as the mortal danger was gone.